One man demands, the other commands; who is the greater?

One man yelled and no one heard him, another said little and all hung on his every word.

At a recent governmental meeting one official spent a tremendous amount of time railing against an initiative. He pounded his fist, raised his voice and performed a number of antics that were memorable. Sitting opposite of him was another official who sat quietly but never said a single world or showed a single emotion or inclination; he just listened. For thirty minutes the discussion continued with the loud official dominating the issue. The quiet man finally cleared his throat and prepared to speak. The entire room became silent.

He spoke softly and with reason, demonstrating an understanding of both sides of the issue. He then gave his own view in a short brief statement. The majority of the members agreed with his assessment and adopted his position, much to the amazement of the more vocal member.

I have been both of these men. I have been the table ponder, nerve rattler and agenda buster. I've also been the poker faced observer who kept his opinion to himself and rarely showed his hand. When I pounded the table I drew attention, when I weighed the situation carefully before speaking I had greater success and commanded the room.

Wisdom, knowledge and positive experience commands the room. A man who demonstrates wisdom, knowledge and positive experience in his family life commands the respect of his wife and family. The man who is lacking in this respect, demands. There is a difference.

There is a passage in Proverbs 17:27 that says "He that hath knowledge spareth his words:[ and] a man of understanding is of an excellent spirit."

It took a little time for me to understand that there is greater strength in commanding the situation than demanding.